UK Casino Review

One for the Brits would be a safe assumption when someone links you to this online casino website, given the whole UK Casino name that goes with the URL in question. And it’s a very particular type of Briton, or rather UK resident, this is aimed at too. Or perhaps that should be a very particular type of UK resident this one is attempting to emulate.

The banner image shows a handsome fellow donning a dinner jacket complete with dicky bow, with his hand in the perfect position to say something along the lines of ‘I’m fastening my jacket button with style and sophistication’. It invokes one thing and one thing only- Bond.

Obviously, there is no franchise tie in here, this isn’t James Bond and the £10 ‘welcome offer’ for new subscribers, which is emblazoned in a bold serif font across the picture would suggest that the clientele aren’t going to be super rich aristocrat types in reality. Nevertheless, everything about UK Casino is aimed at creating an air of class, the likes of which have long since incorrectly defined British people in the eyes of those from other nations, not least the U.S. as a result of depictions in movies.

The truth of the matter, of course, is that British people are largely not like the guy shown on this homepage. At the worst end, they are drunkenly swearing, fighting and trying to bed one another in grey town centres in provincial regions. At best they are elitist snobs that may well own a good dinner jacket, but are no more likely to share the wealth with you and I than the next person, and certainly someone you should be worried about gambling against given they probably gamble all the time and have long since mastered how to be like the house win every time. And I should know, as I’m British.

Cultural background aside, UK Casino is aimed at a UK market, and aims to compete in a heavily saturated area of online gambling. The website layout is clean and very modern, with a notably stripped back, minimal amount of menus and options on display when things first load up. For us that’s refreshing, and certainly a lot less overwhelming when compared with so many counterparts out there on the market. However, it’s also indicative of something we’ll look at later, but can touch upon now – this isn’t the most expansive offering we’ve ever come across. Nevertheless, it does look nice.

More than Just Good Looking

They say that a great body will only get you so far in life, and only for so long. It’s difficult to disagree with those sentiments. Thankfully, then, UK Casino is more than just the pretty, chiseled, masculine but clearly-moisturised face of the guy greeting you at the proverbial door. Sticking with the homepage, scrolling down for just a second gives some idea of the type and quality of what’s on offer. Some of the titles are incredibly new and definitely pretty cutting edge.

Others are less so, but still lots of fun and, in the case of Slots such as Worms and Duckula, guaranteed to strike a chord with any gamer over the age of about 30, given they refer to a classic video game and classic cartoon respectively.

Overall the standard of the ‘machines’ in this digital church of winning cash (if that’s not too blasphemous) is high enough to compete, and the variety is also pretty impressive. There’s everything from traditional three reelers designed to create the feeling of being in a pub or bar, to full blown Live Roulette within a context of reality being the most important thing to emulate. You might eve call it a simulation. Sadly, though, this also leads us on to our first criticism.

Where’s the Poker, John?

You read it here first (probably) – UK Casino does not have a poker table in any way shape or form. Or, if it does, we couldn’t find the game.

This is a huge oversight and up against many casinos it’s simply not good enough. People may be used to casino websites with ‘Slots’ in their name being dedicated to Slots, or Bingo websites focussing entirely on Bingo, but when something is called UK Casino you would expect it to cover every possible aspect of what might ever happen, ever, within an actual real life casino.

Still, at least there are multiple options for game type – Slots, Table and Jackpots. However, the fact that even the Table games section is only concerned with three different types of blackjack and one of poker is another error of judgement. In the past I have seen everything from Craps to obscure Chinese variations on card games you’ve never heard of. The latter might be pushing it a little but at the end of the day it’s not too much to ask for a little poker, is it? You know, the same poker that people all over the world play, potentially the same poker that is the best known, most famous (if not favourite) card game on the planet!

Still, you have to forgive people some sins. Particularly when they are giving you a £10 for nothing.

Speaking of that £10 for Free

To be fair, UK Casino isn’t backwards about coming forwards to invite you and entice you with Welcome promotions. There are two that everyone is immediately eligible to receive – first up a free £10 that requires no deposit on your part, all you need do is sign up. Secondly, there is the offer of a 10% match on your first deposit.

For those unfamiliar with terminology, this basically means that the house, or rather website, will offer anyone 10% of their first deposit again, as a nice little bonus. As it’s a UK website perhaps the phrase ‘Brucey Bonus’ would be most suitable, although that won’t mean anything to anyone reading this (to clarify, it refers to an old TV presenter and celebrity in the UK). Anyway, deposits of any size up to £500 are eligible, so that basically means the website is giving away £50 to reward those willing to stake the most on their claim, with the lowest figure you can put down £10.

In addition to these, there’s a supposedly very tempting VIP offer system, which basically rewards you for loyalty to the website- the more you play the more you stand to benefit from the rewards. Anyone who can join will receive a direct invitation from a member of staff, but this means that you are basically trusting the word of the website that this VIP club is worth the money it will have cost you in the long run to be a part of it. Finally, there are also daily offers and promotions, which you’ll see advertised whilst navigating the site after sign in.

Plenty of Let-Downs

UK Casino could be so good, with its gorgeous design, impressive quality of game, and double sign-up incentives all appealing to any right minded gamer. The Live Roulette is also one of the least glitchy we have ever seen, which makes a huge difference both in terms of enjoyment and basic functionality.

Sadly, though, the praise has to stop there. The number of games is just not enough, and the absence of visible poker on any of the screens you will see if you don’t have an account or aren’t signed in is silly. A missed opportunity, then.